Akon Song Becomes Gay Anthem

Now Hear this !!!

I was reading THE STAR on Monday and I encountered the previous headline. Curiousity got the better of me and I read the article. From the start I must say I understand how homosexuals could adopt the song especially in a society such as ours in which homosexuality is still oppressed. However, the notion that Akon wrote this song with homosexuals in mind is a little far fetched. The lyrics of the song helps one to visualize a love between two people that's not accepted by others. Yes, it could fit but I have a friend that sang that song to a CRV one day because at the time no one wanted to see them together (that's a whole other post in itself).

I have heterosexual friends that love that song. I know of players who use that song to assuage any number of their women when they start to get suspicious. The end result is that it's music and music is a universal language it speaks to everyone. So no matter what sexual preference, nationality,first language, skin color, hair type a good song can abolish all that and just get you to dance. If a homosexual likes the same song as you do does that make you homosexual? (silly rabbit). And even though it might not have intentionally been written for that particular group it touched something in them and they were able to relate. It might be people dont want to see you and your man, youand your car (sigh), you and your job whatever it is it dont matter.So dance if you want to dance and know its music baby, that's what you are supposed to do.

"Nobody want to see us together but it dont matter now,
cause I got you babe." Dont Matter : Akon


Blessed Love,

Mamachel

Mr. Marley "Satisfy My Soul"

Hey Everyone,

I woke up this morning with this song in my head. I've had a wonderful day so far , Mr. Marley can do that you know. :-)

Blessed Love,

Mamachel

Jamaica Hot! Hot! Hot!

Hey All,

Let me start off by saying Global Warming is a bitch!!! I usually restrain myself with the cuss words but "What the bomboclaat is really going on??!!!!" Since when Jamaica get so hot. Duh, its an island sun, fun and all that jazz but of late I have been experiencing a different type of heat.."Heatstroke heat". The type of heat that will make you walk naked a road. The A/C at work not functioning properly so my co-worker has brought a fan hoping that by their powers combined we can get some 'semblance of a breeze. Dare to Dream.. (insert heavy sarcasm)

Don't even get me started on my apartment. The equator ain't got shit on this place. Yes, my A/C is working but unfortunately so is my electric meter and JPS (Jamaica Public Service) don't play when it comes to billing. So I turn the Lasko fan on full blast in hopes that someday, one day, in the near future I can feel some breeze. The only thing Lasko has managed to give me is a sinus attack. I don't know if is global warming causing this type of weather, if is so then unnu betta try cool it down cause Jamaica cyan manage it. No rasta, Summer just start and already I feeling this heat?!!?!!

Please if you have any suggestions on how to keep cool let a sistren know.


Blessed Love,

Mamachel

8 Ways to Know you are NOT his Girlfriend

Hey All!!,


Every once in awhile I will get a phone call from a male friend of mine seeking ideas on how to nicely get rid of a girl that has fallen in love with them. Its like a broken record my conversations,I always ask the same questions and I almost always get the same answers. "Why is this girl stalking you?", "Why does she think she's your girlfriend?" , "Did you tell her it was a friends with benefits situation?" And the only answer I can get is a baffled "Mama just help me nuh please?!!" Just for the record there is hardly ever a nice way to let anyone down. We might believe you at first but we eventually figure it out and that's when it really hurts. Anyways, I have concocted a list to help out both my sistrens
and my bredrens in their quests for love. While it is not a complete list be advised that if you have experienced two or more of these situations.. Ants in your milk.. to clarify... Honey, he ain't your man!!

8 Ways to Tell You're NOT his Girlfriend

1. Doesn't interact with you in public - If your dates resembles a vampires and its only indoors and at night, no parties then honey you have problems.

2. Didn't Spend New Year's Eve with you - We all know the story who you kissing at midnight is who you kissing for the year (guys believe this also) and this is one occasion he cannot worm out of with the missus.

3.You can't get through to him after certain hours - When a guy is into you he will be accessible when he doesnt pick up he's probably with the real wifey.

4.On the rare occasion that you do meet people he introduces you as a "Friend".

5. On that note You have never met ANY of his friends - This is to ensure that he has a clean break once he's through with you.

6. Doesn't sleep over after sex- forget that excuse of not liking to cuddle,he can at least stay over.

7. Has never met his parent/s - This is a given no explanation needed if its serious you will meet the parents.

The Best for Last....

8. He's never told, asked, hinted, behaved exhibited and feeling to be more than just "friends". - Stop "thinking" you are his girlfriend and start knowing. If you are not certain then ask its that simple but save yourself the embarassment girl.


Mamachel,

Blessed Love

Heros: What kinda Hero would you be?

Hey Guys,

I have an addiction. A serious addiction, I am not alone in this, millions around the world will tell you the same thing. They are addicted to HEROES. This is one seriously addictive show. Tonight is the second to last episode. Next week is the season finale and while I cant wait it is a little bittersweet. What will I watch? How can I survive without my Heroes? All this got me thinking if I was a Hero what powers would I want? Hmmmm... I have no clue. I know I wouldn't want to read minds ( I'm sure nice things aren't said about me all the time). I wouldn't want to be radio-active, nope not invisible (I can do that without powers). I'm thinking I would want to be indestructible like Claire.

Let Mamachel know what power you would want if you were a Hero?


Blessed Love,

Mamachel a.k.a Ja Hero


P.S. Stay tuned for my Jamaican Heroes Plot!!!

Bob Woolmer Conspiracy?!!

What's Up!

Mamachel have somethings on her mind about this Bob Woolmer situation that just will not go away. As of today Scotland Yard has stated that Mr. Woolmer died of heart failure. This report is in direct conflict with the Jamaican Constabulary's report which states that he died from "manual strangulation". No disrespect but what the hell is going on?!!! Okay, lets take a step back Bob Woolmer was found in his hotel room less than 24 hours after the Pakistani team was beaten in a World Cup Cricket match. He was pronounced dead at Kingston Public Hospital. Due to the suspicious circumstances an autopsy was performed and it was found that the man died from strangulation. Be patient.. its getting juicy now. Upon receiving the body Scotland Yard performed their own inquiry and is now claiming that boss man Woolmer died from Heart Failure. This is very embarassing are you telling me that our coroners cannot tell the difference between strangulation and a heart attack?(insert heavy sarcasm)

THough it can never be disputed that Bob Woolmer was a excellent and brilliant coach. One must look at the circumstances surrounding this alleged heart attack.
1. Pakistani team loses a very important game in what is quintessentially the super bowl of cricket.
2. Bob Woolmer is found murdered in hotel room.
3. Media frenzy begins
4. Pakistani team is fingerprinted and questioned (procedure)
5. Talk of Woolmer exposing match fixing and betting start to emerge.
6. Jamaican Police fly to England to meet with Scotland Yard
7. Woolmer's body sent to Scotland Yard
8. Scotland Yard says Bob Woolmer died of heart attack.

Did anyone know that they set fire to his house down in Pakistan before he left? Where are the reports of what he was really involved in. I cannot help but feel that this is a cover-up in order to maintain Mr. Woolmer's good name. Normally, I wouldnt have been upset, however, when you try and make Jamaica look incompetent in the process, we have a problem.

Truth, Love and Prosperity,

Mamachel '07

Jamaican Driver!! Dont stop at all

Hey All,

Each day I take a taxi to and from work.(sigh) Yes, this is extremely expensive and I wait with bated breath for the day when I can "push my own key". Nevertheless, not one to miss the silver lining these daily interactions have left me with one insight "I can strike a conversation with anybody". I know you think i'm joking but trust me, the different types of characters and I do mean different that I meet almost daily is a testament to my versatility. Let me introduce my characters (of course I changed the names!! *wink*wink*)

1. Columbus- This charming deportee is a certified ladies man. A girlfriend and wife pregnant he is constantly on the prowl for another victim. Clients included. Our conversations will usually go something like this
Columbus: Mamachel how can I get a girl like you?
Mamachel: Leave me alone! You'd have to reborn.

2.Bernie - Poor soul... He has a girlfriend that is soooo using him. I know I only have one part of the story but he's taking care of her two kids because his baby mother take care of his and paying the rent. He wakes up early like 5:30 a.m. to drop everyone to work and school and then he begins his day. Yet still all she ever talks about is how she well want a man that drive a Prado, BMW or even a CRV...... Poor ting. Whenever I drive with him I take on the role of therapist "homeboy need some self-esteem"

3. Ass - I cant stand this guy!! But for some reason most mornings he's the only taxi in my vicinity. Absolutely no manners. A conversation with this one #76 you know who you are goes like this

Mamachel: Good Morning
Ass: -----
Mamachel: Bwaay this traffic sure is a killer this morning wonder if I going to reach work on time?
Ass: ----
Mamachel: ----
Ass: That is $350.00
Mamachel: *In my head* Asshole..

Most mornings I get into work I've already had a full days experience. I can tolerate all of these personalities. As a matter of fact I have grown to love my daily interactions, I find most of them colourful and well mannered except for you know who. Stay Tuned for your next update on "The Taxi man Chronicles"


Mamachel,

Blessed Love

"Driver dont stop at all" - Buju Banton

Monkey Business

Hey Guys,

Every once in awhile you have a bad week. If you did I hope this will allow you to laugh off all the bad vibrations you've experienced this week and get ready for a new one. Some Jamaican humor for you

Blessed Love,

Mamachel '07

A monkey is sitting in a tree smoking a spliff when a lizard walks past, looks up and says to the monkey, "Wha gwaan?"

The monkey says, "Yu wan some?"
So the lizard climbs up and sits next to the monkey and they burn the herb.

After a while the lizard says his mouth is 'dry' and that he's going to get a drink from the river. The lizard climbs down the tree, goes to the river and leans over to get his drink.. Well, the lizard is so high that he leans too far over, and falls into the river.

Check out this Joke:
A Crocodile sees this and swims over to the lizard, helping him to the side, then asks, "What's the matter with you?"
The lizard explains to the crocodile that he was sitting in a tree smoking a spliff with a monkey and got too stoned, which caused him to fall into the river while taking a drink.

The crocodile says he's got to check this monkey out and walks off, where he finds the tree and the monkey is still sitting and puffing on his joint.
He looks up and says "Hey you!"

The Monkey looks down and says, "A wah de Bloodclaat dis?......A how much water you drink?